me: can’t just keep spending money on urself whenever u feel sad
me: yeah u can
mom: "oh you look so tan, are you wearing bronzer?"
me: "what? oh no that's dorito dust."
I AM SUPER CHILL ALL THE TIME!
"how do you picture yourself in 10 years"
I’m gunna go talk to some wine about this
local art teacher crashes wedding, drinks all the whiskey.
one direction: you are by far the loudest crowd yet!!!!
why am I even applying for jobs? I’m sure some crusty old white guy would pay decent money to watch me eat a boston cream donut naked.
I pulled a ~hilarious prank today where I texted this photo to some of my more gullible friends and said I was engaged and everyone was PISSED